Tell him his poetry stinks and then kick him down the stairs!

Today was fan-freaking-tastic. I don't know about you, but any day that involves Cary Grant angrily shouting, "tell him his poetry stinks and then kick him down the stairs!" into a phone is pretty good. But then I had the added bonuses as follows:

1) I got to see my grandpa! Granted, he was a little more interested in the children than me, but still. He's grandpa! He's the one that once taught me this poem:

"the trapezeman flies with the greatest of class
he missed the trapeze and he falls on the.... grass."

2) My grandpa witnessing the glory that is my 3 year old nephew saying, "Do you want tickets to the gun show? They're right over there!" I am SO proud.

3) I got to hang out with a new friend! Though technically I've known this guy for a retardedly long time without putting in the required effort to make him hang out with me. We saw the aforementioned Cary Grant movie, and we came up with the idea for a buddy cop show about a pyromaniac zombie and a vampire hunter.

4) I got to speak with the aforementioned person's mother on the phone. It was awesomely awkward.

5) The new Iphone came out today! Awesome!

Stevenson: So, did you get an Iphone?
Me: um
Me: no
Me: why?
Stevenson: My store is right next to a Cingular store, and there were people camping out.
Stevenson: It was retarded.
Me: haha lame
Stevenson: I only bring it up because I'm looking at a website where somebody dissected one.
Me: is it awesome inside?
Me: does it remind you of hooker entrails?
Stevenson: I have no idea what all this crap in here is.
Me: that's how I feel when I look at hooker entrails
Me: that doesn't keep me from wearing them as a hat though

6) I got an AWESOME letter from GDN. And another small frog from the DNs. Yes, I now own 4 frogs as given to me by the DNS. I love this. I need to come up with Dschinghis Khan-based names for them.