So I agreed to do a wedding video for some people.  It was for free, so I could practice wedding video, as I am doing one for money later on.  A friend who was doing the still photos for this free wedding asked the couple if I could do video at their wedding, they said yes.

It is four months later and I haven't gotten it done.  Part of this is due to health issues...  I have had a really hard time lately... a month long bought of bronchitis so severe that they had to check me for pneumonia stands out especially, but there was the two week itchiness not too long after, and the ongoing battle with depression that seems to get steadily worse no matter how hard I try to claw myself out of it.

Speaking of the depression:  its odd.  Most people I know have something they can point to, or a few things they can point to, but... my life is fine.  There is nothing wrong with it.  But I can't get out of this funk.  I thought it was just laziness for awhile, but my therapist says there's definitely something wrong with me.  I can't even get up the energy to do things I want to do or actually like doing, so it's not just the things I or nobody wants to do that I neglect.

So anyway, along with these problems I have kind of been dragging my feet on doing this project.  It feels similar to what one would call writer's block, only of course with video.  Every time I think of doing it I get sick to my stomach.  Also, to make matters worse, I think they want a DVD, and still, no matter how hard Jeremy & I try, the DVD authoring software mystifies us.  It seems almost pointless to make a great product and then give it to them on a jacked up DVD that makes it look like crap.

I got an email from the groom the other day; it seemed cordial enough.  Something like, "We're moving to Texas soon, we'd like a DVD before we move."  Since I was still grappling with the DVD software, and he didn't give a specific date, I just replied "I'll try my best."

I got a SUPER angry email back from him.  It said that they demand an explanation for the delay, the raw footage if I can't get the video itself done, and that I should be thanking them for the opportunity.  I know it's their wedding and important to them, but I'm not sure why he exploded on me.... it's not like they paid me or even gave up another videographer for me.  No contract was ever written up, I never even really spoke with them directly.

I dunno, I'm not sure what to respond with... I kind of want to defend myself, but that seems like just arguing which wouldn't solve anything.  I'm tempted to take the easy way out and just send them all the raw footage, since the email specifically mentions that I should at least give them that.  As it is, what I had decided on was maybe getting it done THEN emailing them so that I could have something positive to say about myself.  But now... I didn't want to work on it before, and him being such a dick about it makes me REALLY not want to work on it.

Plus I have some paid work that I feel I can't do until I get this sorted out, so I'm putting that off too...

Guh.  This is ALL my fault.  Which is why I'm posting it here where only a couple people read rather than on facebook or whatever.  I don't need to be told that I caused this problem all by myself, because I already know.  If I didn't, I have had Jeremy nagging me about this video for months, too.  But grr.  I hate them and I hate myself.  And this is how I express it.