there you go

Getz: make him tell me what he's getting me for christmas
me: What?
Getz: I hate surprise
Me (to ponytail geek): are you getting her an STD?
Ponytail Geek: no
Me (to getz): what are you worrying about then?
Getz: I hate surprises
me: well no matter what it's got to be better than an STD
Ponytail geek: maybe I'll get her a lump of coal now
Me: Hey, that's better than ghonorhea!