whenever I let my guard down whatever I was ignorring

So job interview today:

Kind of crappy in that you need a photo id to get into the building. And I... didn't have one.

Otherwise: actually went amazingly well. I don't know if I've been to enough job interviews now, or the fact that I don't know if I even particularly want the job so there's less pressure, I thought I fucked it up already so there was less pressure, or the fact that I have had a real job for awhile now, and can dredge up actual examples when they ask me something or what, but I felt like I was on my game and not coked up weasel this time.

Also today I told a guy I'm a pill popper, a racist, I've actually told someone suicidal (LSEG, definately not Ryan) to "just go ahead and do it, you faker!" before, described my gallbladder operation in mind numbing detail, probably repeated more than one story about annoying customers at the store, mocked his mother's agoraphobia, and he still seems somewhat interested. Go me!

Lastly: that chickenshit Jersey has not called or txted me to say sorry or argue that his mom is not a filthy whore. Considering he never even told me he was not coming (Opt finally txted him "YES OR NO" and he gave her some BS excuse about his brother), in fact that he told me that he was coming even as late as DURING the party, and a day later still hasn't said anything about it directly to me, I've decided I'm justified to say anything to him (such as "I want to shoot you and fuck the brain hole") or do anything to him (such as kicking him in the nuts) I want if I ever do see that weasel again.