So, my grandpa died this week. He was my last grandparent left. I mean, I could see it happening sooner or later, he'd been having a lot of health problems these last few years, but of course it never makes it easier. I have to say, he's probably also the only grandparent I was upset about passing. The first two went when I was really young, and the other one I never got along with all that well.

I'm not as sad as when my mom passed, which of course makes sense as I was a lot closer to her and saw her more often. But it seems to be expressing itself in a weird way too. Like with my mom I got all depressed and started crying all the time. I haven't really cried, but other things that usually don't bum me out as much have been making me more upset than usual so I'm sure it's probably related. I'm sure being on anti depressants makes a difference in how your emotions work too.

What sucks is how small I feel like my family is getting... Since we don't keep in contact with our extended relatives, basically all I have left is my dad and my sister. And my dad is going to turn 70 this year. I know it's morbid, but.... I think about it all the time. And it's so hard to keep in contact with my sister and her family, we're both so busy and have completely opposite schedules.

The older I get the more relationships I have, some of them that seemed rock solid, go awry. I look back on them and try to see what I should've done differently, what I did wrong. Family, though, is the security blanket. You or they have to really suck to alienate each other. I don't want my family to get smaller.

But I guess that's my own selfish reaction to grandpa passing away. I miss him, for him too, though. He was a really fun guy and was one of those people whose brains are completely agile right up till the end, his 90's.

So I changed my hierarchy of "annoying calls at work."

From most annoying to least annoying, it used to go:

Hostile people
People who don't speak English at all
Dumb people
People who don't speak English well

Of course, people who are combinations of any of the above are the most most annoying. I used to put hostile people above the others because they don't HAVE to be jerkoffs, whereas dumb people and foreigners don't really have a choice. But now hostile people are probably lower, as usually they yell at you briefly and just hang up and you don't have to deal with them anymore.

Anyway, aside from that change, I have a new category that goes on top. People who won't fucking listen to you. I got two extreme examples of this tonight on internet calls. Internet calls, for those who haven't heard me bitch about my job before (though these are usually the least annoying calls as they are straightforward and uncomplicated... unless the person is extremely annoying for other reasons) are when someone can't get into their internet acct with us. We have them answer their security questions to verify their identity, and then provide them with their username (if they forgot it), reset their password, and/or unlock their account if they've failed at their password too many times or failed at answering their security questions too many times.

Security questions are hard for people to get... the computer's a little picky on how they're typed in and if they don't get it exactly right, they can't get in. So after they answer it close enough for a human to think they're right, we tell them exactly how it's typed in so they can get past it.

If we reset their password, it gets changed to their birthdate in the format MMDDYYYY. Then, once they login with that password, the computer prompts them to pick a new password.

Not fucking rocket science, especially if you have someone on the phone with you walking you through it step by step.

Ugh, but I had this lady, this fucking lady who would not fucking listen to me. I'm not even going to go into the other one.

Me: So, I'm going to go over your security questions with you so that you can get past them, then I'm going to give you your password (past experience has taught me to do this first, otherwise the person is typing in their password etc. while I'm trying to tell them their security questions, and won't listen). The answer to the first question is Monkey. And--
Lady: There's nowhere to type that in!
Me: Okay, we haven't gotten to that yet. I'm just letting you know your security questions before we get to the password. So the first question, the answer is--
Lady: But there's nowhere to put it in!
Me: I know. You'll need to put in your username and password first, but I'm telling you this now so that you will know when you get there. So I'm going to go over the questions for you. So the answer to the first question is Monkey. The second is Chevrolet Cavalier--
Lady: There's nowhere to type that in!
Me: I know. But we're going to get that. So anyway, the answer is Monkey--
Lady: I already put in Monkey, that's how it got locked up the first time.
Me: I know, but as I said before the computer is really picky about how they're typed in, so I'm telling you exactly how they are typed in. So it's Monkey. Then the second one is Chevrolet Cavalier. There is a space between Chevrolet and Cavalier. The computer will not take it without that space.
Lady: I already put it in like that.
Me: Okay, I understand that you had problems before, that is why I'm making sure you have the answers so that when you login, it will all be correct. I have to go over all of them to make sure. So, the third answer is--
Lady: Rio De Janeiro, I know!
Me: Yes, but I have to tell you how it is typed in. Rio SPACE De SPACE Janeiro, then you have another space, and the word "Brazil."
Lady: I typed it in like that!
Me: Okay, and your password is going to be your birthdate, in the format two digits for month--
Lady: What is the password?
Me: Okay, and your password is going to be your birthdate, in the format two digits for month--
Lady: That's all?
Me: I'm not finished.... two digits for month, two digits for day, FOUR digits for year
Lady: Okay, I'm trying it. Two digits for year, right?
Me: No, FOUR digits for year.
Lady: Okay *tries it, surprisingly gets the password right somehow, but is baffled by the security questions*
Me: Okay, I'm going to go through the security questions again *another argument about how she already put them in right*
Me: Okay, listen closely *bitch keeps interrupting me, I am almost shouting listen closely to her over and over, she won't fucking shut up* "You have Rio De Janeiro Brazil. There is a space between Chevrolet and Cavalier--
Lady: I have to put "cavalier?"
Me: Yes, you have to put cavalier. Now, you have Rio SPACE De SPACE Janeiro SPACE Brazil.
Lady: I know

so she still can't get again. Lots more "please listen closelys" I'm about to lose it

Me: Look, I am going to spell everything exactly as it is in there. Please, please listen closely. C-H-E-V-R-O-L-E-T SPACE C-A-V-A-L-I-E-R.
Lady: I know, I know
Me: Just, please listen closely. I have R-I-O SPACE D-E SPACE J-A-N-E-I-R-O space B-R-A-Z-I-L.
Lady: Yes, I know. R-I-O-D-E SPACE J-A-N-E-R-O
Me: No, no no. Please listen closely. There is a SPACE between Rio and De, and you have to spell Janeiro differently, and you HAVE to have Brazil. *I do it all over*
Her: Z-I-L? What? That's not how to spell Janeiro...
Me: Brazil. You have to have Brazil on the end.
Her: R-I-O SPACE D-E SPACE J-A-N-E-R-O space B-R-A-Z-I-L
Me: I spell Janeiro for her again
Her: That's not how it's spelled!
Me: That's how it is in here, you can change it once you're logged in
Her: *finally gets in, mercifully seems to not have many troubles changing her password--the other lady I mentioned was fucking up that part considerably... but I'm too tired after writing about this lady to go into the other lady's problems, just know they are almost equal and I had to take both of these calls in one night*

In other news, more poop problems lately. Not sure exactly when they started, but it was a day or few before I went to Chicago. I really need to see my poop doctor. And still need to see my regular doctor about my persistently sore/dry throat (which, of course, is not helped by having to yell at stupid customers all day). Meh.

Which, btw, I WENT TO CHICAGO. A lot of people who live around here go all the time, but to me it's a big deal, I've only gone a handful of times in my lifetime even though it's only a couple hours away. I know it's a city with a more working class reputation or whatever, but it usually seems classy and elegant.... even with the occasional homeless person. The skyline is so beautiful, and all of the architecture is beautiful and unique. Whereas if you live in a smaller town, esp. one that got most of it's growth in the later 20th century... everything's all boring and box-like.

Anyway, Jeremy and I went up there because there was a Ben Folds show. I probably wouldn't've gone all the way to Chicago for a concert, even Ben, if I didn't have Jeremy. One, he really likes Ben too, and has never seen him. Two, he drove--I'm scared of driving in the third largest city in the US and avoid it if possible. We even got a hotel room and stayed the night so we could do more in the city.

There were some obstacles, for sure. 1) The weather was colder than we expected so we didn't dress for it. A good amount of our outside time (which was a lot, we walked a lot of places) was unpleasant. 2) Jeremy has problems with his knees or something, and we had to walk more than expected, so he was sore. 3) It was like, impossible to buy a fucking pass for the El. The extra walking was us walking all over trying to buy passes.

But there was definite goodness!

1) The hotel was really nice, and the continental breakfast was sweeeet
2) We went to a couple really good restaurants, which even further solidified my notion of Chicago's classiness. And they were tasty!
3) We went to the Art Institute. They have SO many famous paintings, ones I would've never guessed at. Seriously--more famous impressionist paintings than probably the Louvre has. A fuck ton of Monets, Renoirs, Van Gogh, etc. A really awesome famous Seurat* And that's just scraping the surface-i.e. things I personally like, there was some neo classicism or whatever, the sculptures of Rodin (though not the Thinker itself), fuck tons of Matisse (I hate that guy, I believe he is expressionist), Gaugin etc. The Seurat I mentioned was particularly impressive in person. It is made up of tiny, tiny dots and is on a huge canvas, and had this glow about it.
4) We went to Navy Pier. We took a boat tour on Lake Michigan, and the skyline was beautiful. And had funnel cake!

I'm going on another brief trip soon, Jeremy's birthday is on the first and we're going to his parent's house in Jacksonville for the weekend. Should be good, his parents seem pretty nice from what I can tell the last time we visited.

I'm saving the rest of my paid vacation for the trip to Grandpa's that may or may not ever happen, and the trip Ryan's taking up here. Both of which I'm looking forward to.

Other than that, I'm obsessed with a computer game called Dragon Age. Great graphics, even better story.

Oh, also that bastard rabbit has taken to tearing up my carpeting :/

__________
* paintings I saw included but were not limited to:
-4 monet haystacks Probably his lamest thing, but famous.

-Fucktons of other monet including this

-No Starry Night, but there's one of the famous self portraits, and I think I saw the bedroom one

-Renoir, my favorite, ton others

-the awesome-ass Seurat

Guh... My throat has been dry and scratchy for like.... a really long time. It sucks, I have to conserve my talking for my stupid job that I hate and use it less for talking to actual people. I need to see a doctor or something.

It's true.... I comforted that guy with the observation that the last two panels were impossible.... T would NEVER disrespect a man's mother like that.

And another one...

Fun day. Went to get my car washed with my dad... which is his idea of fun, anyway. We had lunch, too.

Talked with Julie a little while, though not forever cause she called while I was with Dad. Will have to call her back.

Hung out with Jeremy... he's attempting to teach me to ride a bike. I dunno, the last time I tried it seemed really fun, and ridiculous, and I didn't feel too bad that I didn't get it because I was using a bike way too tall for me and I could blame that. This time.... well, I made a lot more progress, but there were these two little kids cruising around the same parking lot biking as naturally as walking, and it made me feel bad. I kept thinking of what people were thinking, which is not something I usually do. Still, I intend to keep trying for a little while.

I've not heard the end of it, since that guy at car-ex called Jeremy "bro." :)

suibrom: haha

I will tron all over

me: haha wow I've never heard tron as a euphemism for come before

suibrom: haha I figured that was the next logical step

me: do you have to yell tron as you come?

suibrom: Yes, or that I am "tronning"

me: man I have deja vu... I think I told people you have to yell tron when you come when I said I was from tron when I met your friends at the cabin

suibrom: haha you did tell that to people at the cabin

me: Should I be happy or sad that apparently sayingn tron when you come is something I must think of a lot rather than something that can only come up once a lifetime as random chance?

suibrom: it is awesome, so you should be happy

it means you're tronning a lot

I'm so fucking tired of being a sickly motherfucker... I used to be the healthiest in my family. Now, not so much. It's sad when you start falling apart at 18.

So... Tues night I got the beginnings of a migraine. The worst I've had in my life. Awesome. Hated it, but endured all Weds with it. Then came Thurs. I had to work. I'm one absence away from getting written up and lately people are getting fired for tiny little reasons. So... yeah... that was fun. Oh, and should I mention that since I was taking more migraine pills for a longer period than I ever have in my life, they were upsetting my digestive system and I was having tons of diarrhea?

Fucking fuck... I should goddamn be allowed to stay at home when I'm that sick. But I can't get any fucking FMLA for any of my colitis absences, so I guess I'm fucked.

Fri I didn't feel awesome, but whatever, it was such an improvement. Yesterday I had somewhat of a headache, too.

Today I felt better.... until my goddamn period started. Guh, way worse than a period should be. If humans still had to fend for themselves in the wild I'd be the sickly one that died a looong time ago.

But I'm glad I didn't die, because I met Jeremy, who should hate me by now for my whininess but instead took care of me quite wonderfully.

In other news, music videos that I like (some are not new):

me: I have to work soon :/
damn this need I have to keep myself in the style to which I have become accustomed
suibrom: what style is that?
me: cristale every night, a high class call girl on each arm and a 1994 Toyota Camry
to be seen in about town
duuuuuh
suibrom: haha
you are a classy lady
me: I know, right?

Meh. I've had a sore throat for days and days now. Which sucks, esp. given that I talk for a living. It is sort of perplexing... it's not gotten worse (which is good) but it hasn't been getting better (which is bad). Stupid... throat.

Me bad at blogging these days.

The last post was basically copied off of an email I sent to Josh. This update is to whine about my own laziness.

I.E. Things I've needed to do for months now:

-dentist
-butt doctor
-regular doctor
-IRA deposit

I need to make appointments. Am I going to do it today? ....outlook not good.

Birthday weekend was sweeeet! For lunch on Sat Jeremy took me to this Victorian tea house in Clinton that Judy was talking about the other day and sounded really good. The tea and the meal were pretty good, but I am not exaggerating when I say my dessert, the lemon cake, was THE BEST FUCKING LEMON CAKE I'VE EVER HAD IN MY LIFE. It was soooo good.

For dinner my family took me to this chinese place I really love. Brody (Phew 2 and also the one who constantly screams if one attempts to take him to a restaurant) was not present (my brother in law who doesn't like chinese food stayed home and watched him) but the Phew was there and hilarious. He randomly poked Lori in the arm and was
like, "Cheese touch!" She had never seen him do cheese touch before and was trying to figure out where he picked it up, but I guess he made it up. Someone pokes you and says cheese touch, and if you aren't crossing your fingers, you end up with cheese touch.

Then, at one point the cheese touch was passed to Jeremy, and he had
to go to the bathroom. While he was gone, the Phew was all, "Jeremy's
got cheese touch! Jeremy's got cheese touch!" Which was particularly
hilarious because our waiter's name was also Jeremy and we kept
wondering if he'd come by and wonder how he got cheese touch and what
it is.

My family got me some decent loot. I got a gift card for Meijer, but also a lot of cooking stuff I wanted like a sweet-ass nonstick rolling pin and a spatula that's not half melted, and some books I wanted (Jeremy got me some books I wanted and a bigger pasta strainer I can actually hook to the sink so I can set it down and have my hand free).

Then I took off work Sun & Jeremy & I hung out more which was fun. We went to the mall because he needed some pants, and I found all these pretty nice shirts at Old Navy for only $5. They also had some dog outfits. I bought one and tried to make 007 wear it but he squirmed out of it pretty easily, even though I got the appropriate size. I took it back today and got a refund worth twice as much as one of the shirts I got.

Conver with Ryan

Ryan: maybe you can txt eachother the answers
Me: haha I'm not allowed to utilize or bring any electronic communicating device, including but not limited to cell phones, mp3 players, and pagers. Those bastards.
Me: Rush helps me add
Me: Queen helps me spell
Ryan: hahah word
Me: with out Tom Sawyer I think two plus two is fifteen
Me: without fat bottom girls I think tree is spelled Taskdjfa
Ryan: oh crap! It's not?
Me: I know, right?
Me: classic rock, I need you now!
Ryan: rock out!
Me: bohemian rhapsody is how I know how to spell bohemian.
Me: and rhapsody
Ryan: haha okay that may be valid
Me: modern music just isn't as educational
Ryan: how am I supposed to know how to spell when poker face is on?
Ryan: I can't think about anything except stabbing lady gaga
Me: hahaha

Jeremy had two separate conversations with me in his sleep again... so adorable!

Jeremy: *noise*
Me: What?
Jeremy: Judiste!
Me: What is a Judiste?
Jeremy: It's a monster!
Me: What kind of monster?
Jeremy: It's like part caped super hero and part Jew
Me: It's part jew?
Jeremy: Yes
Me: What is its weapons?
Jeremy: *mumble mumble and Jew Love*
Me: Jew love?
Jeremy: Yes
Me: Is jew love a weapon?
Jeremy: no, it's love.
Me: What's five times four?
Jeremy: four
Me: I love you!
Jeremy: I love you!

second conver:

Jeremy: Yaaaay!
Me: Why yay?
Jeremy: Volleyball no more
Me: No more volleyball?
Jeremy: yeah
Me: Do you hate volleyball?
Jeremy: I don't give a damn, it's just *mumble mumble*

So there's this band, Say Anything, that I really like. They had a deal a few months ago where if you pay them some money (yeah, I probably spent too much but what the hell) the lead singer would write and perform a song about whatever you want. I'd recently bought a rabbit who foiled my every attempt at... everything.

I got it yesterday... if you want to hear it, download here:

http://www.zshare.net/audio/715498944bff861b/

P.S. The crotch thing, out of context, is gross. Basically he will lick whatever is in front of him if you scratch him vigorously. When I decided to show my friends Julie & Lothar this trick, he happened to be on my lap and it looked like he was giving me a BJ. It was hilarious and I mentioned that it the notes, which was probably a mistake. Now if I ever want to play this song for anyone, I have to explain that part :P

Jeremy is, to all appearances, asleep.

Jeremy: *starts laughing*
Me: What's so funny?
Jeremy: *sad groan*
Me: What?
Jeremy: *sad groan*
Me: What?
Jeremy: I don't remember
Me: So you dreamed of something funny, laughed, woke up, and forgot what it was?
Jeremy: I don't know
Me: Are you asleep right now?
Jeremy: No
Me: Are you asleep right now?
Jeremy: No
Amy: Are you talking to me in your sleep?
Jeremy: No
Amy: What's 4 times 5?
Jeremy: 5
Amy: You are asleep!
Jeremy: 20
Amy: Maybe not...

*pause*

Amy: I love you!
Jeremy: *sad groan*
Amy: Are you upset or something?

No answer. He told me afterwards that he didn't remember anything, so probably had been asleep. It was pretty funny.

Shit or get off the pot. Shit or get off the pot. Shit or get off the pot. Shit or get off the pot. Shit or get off the pot. Shit or get off the pot.

Try your hardest at your stupid job or quit. Try your hardest at your stupid job or quit. Try your hardest at your stupid job or quit. Try your hardest at your stupid job or quit. Try your hardest at your stupid job or quit. Try your hardest at your stupid job or quit. Try your hardest at your stupid job or quit.

Dunno, message to myself. I really felt like quitting today, instead I just went home. Which is not shitting or getting off the pot. I need to really buckle down and earn the promotion they've been waving like a carrot in my face ever since I got the damned job (not that I didn't work that hard in the beginning, not that I'm doing a shitty job now, but there's so much competition you need to give it your all--which I don't). Or quit. I have no other job lined up. But I want to quit so bad. Quit, quit, quit. Someone... convince me to do one or the other. Please.

Bleh. Anyone know anything about vacuums?

I find the choices confusing. Right now I have a small-ish dirt devil upright bagless vacuum cleaner. Since I got the bunny, I can't vacuum without this one stupid hose being clogged up constantly, and it's a pain in the ass to dig out the hair.

So... I know a ton of people don't have indoor rabbits, but anyone with a cat or dog have a suggestion? I've been looking at the "pet" or "animal" vacuums and it seems their deal is just some random rubber attachment that helps you clean up the fur. That's not the problem, I just don't want it clogged all the time.

My secondary requirement is I don't want it to weigh a fuck ton and be a pain to push around. But I'm afraid the lighter ones will be like my current one and get clogged. So this is a somewhat negotiable requirement.

Price... I don't want a $500 vacuum. I mean, I'll get a moderately pricey vacuum if it does what I want and lasts a long time but $500 seems ridiculous for a vacuum.

So... err... suggestions?

Dear diary:

Today I squeezed my bunny's butt, and poop came out!

He also came to me in response to the song "Baby Got Back."

I think I'm a little too obsessed with rabbit ass.

But it's so biiiig!