This was orig. an email to Tina but I find it completely hilarious so everyone, enjoy:

This was orig. an email to Tina, but I thought you would find it amusing too:

Tina: I had a crazy dream last night.

I dreamt that someone came up behind me and was groping my breast region. And I was like, trying to get him to leave them alone, but not like, alarmed as I would be if this had happened in real life. But then, I SWEAR TO GOD, whoever it was was like, "Yeeeess! I've touched your booooobs." In THIS EXACT VOICE.

So creepy.

Anyway, this was one of those dreams within a dream, so I like "woke up" and immediately called you to be like, "Tina, I had the weirdest dream." But I wasn't like at home, I was like, working at Borders again and it was Christmas time and for some reason they were making us stay overnight because we were so busy. And your reply was, "Sounds like an HR problem." And I was like, "What the hell does that mean?" but you had hung up already. But then, I realized you meant someone probably really had groped me instead of it being a dream, so I spent the whole rest of the dream trying to find out who there had groped me. True story.